Quotation from: The Arrow of Gold

Written by: Joseph Conrad


I felt tears come into my eyes at the memory of her laughter, the
true memory of the senses almost more penetrating than the reality
itself. It haunted me. All that appertained to her haunted me
with the same awful intimacy, her whole form in the familiar pose,
her very substance in its colour and texture, her eyes, her lips,
the gleam of her teeth, the tawny mist of her hair, the smoothness
of her forehead, the faint scent that she used, the very shape,
feel, and warmth of her high-heeled slipper that would sometimes in
the heat of the discussion drop on the floor with a crash, and
which I would (always in the heat of the discussion) pick up and
toss back on the couch without ceasing to argue. And besides being
haunted by what was Rita on earth I was haunted also by her
waywardness, her gentleness and her flame, by that which the high
gods called Rita when speaking of her amongst themselves. Oh, yes,
certainly I was haunted by her but so was her sister Therese--who
was crazy. It proved nothing. As to her tears, since I had not
caused them, they only aroused my indignation. To put her head on
my shoulder, to weep these strange tears, was nothing short of an
outrageous liberty. It was a mere emotional trick. She would have
just as soon leaned her head against the over-mantel of one of
those tall, red granite chimney-pieces in order to weep
comfortably. And then when she had no longer any need of support
she dispensed with it by simply telling me to go away. How
convenient! The request had sounded pathetic, almost sacredly so,
but then it might have been the exhibition of the coolest possible
impudence. With her one could not tell. Sorrow, indifference,
tears, smiles, all with her seemed to have a hidden meaning.
Nothing could be trusted. . . Heavens! Am I as crazy as Therese I
asked myself with a passing chill of fear, while occupied in
equalizing the ends of my neck-tie.

PREVIOUS GROUP HOME SITE HOME NEXT
Old Dominion University CS Dept
Designed by Joan A. Smith for the CRATE project
Created: 2007-2-22T12:35:29Z
Part of the CratePreservation Project
Change Tag: ~~ 0 ~~
Part of a series of experiments in web preservation under the direction of Michael L. Nelson, Ph.D.